The Fish

There once was a fish in a lake,
Who wondered "how much would it take
To sprout a few limbs on the tiniest whim,
To run faster than all of those hake?"

So she talked to the resident carp,
Who was apparently ever so sharp,
And he said to go deep, find the submarine sheep,
Who he said would be playing a harp.

Now the fish was mighty confused,
Thought that the carp might have been on the booze,
But she harkened his word, though it was so absurd,
And down to the lakebed she cruised.

She alighted down on the sand,
Heard music from a rock band,
So followed the noise like a crazy porpoise
To find what she could never have planned:

A sheep in an astronaut suit,
Playing the drums and a rather loud flute,
Stamping his feet along to the beat,
With an occasional bleat or a hoot.

"Ahoy there!" the fish cried out loud,
So the sheep dropped his flute and he bowed,
"Bonjour madamoiselle!", he bleated with a yell,
"My name is Sir Timothy Stroud."

"A knight?!" the fish cried in surprise,
As the sheep gazed at her with his eyes;
He saw all her dreams and he planned her a scheme,
To win her the ultimate prize.

"Yes, a knight I am indeed,
For saving endangered seaweed -
But don't worry about I, it is you that must try
To earn you those legs that you need."

He told her how to get onto land,
How to clamber over the sand,
And then how to do what no others would do,
So she could have legs to stand.

Sir Timothy made her a bowl,
And a stand on which she could roll,
Then send her up with wishes of luck,
As she set off to reach her goal.

She swam all the way to the beach,
Her dreams just within her reach,
So she rolled her contraption up into action,
And off she zoomed with a screech!

Her vehicle was simply superb -
She could even drive up on the kerb;
She was really rather pleased.

However one day she discovered
That she was lonely, except for a buzzard
Who came for a chat about this and that
Every now and again...

So she returned to the lake,
Told the boisterous hake
All about her adventures on land.
And yes, she enjoyed her exploring, thank you,
But it was time to do something more boring.
Sir Timothy Stroud needed a hand,
And this fish would be the first member of his band.

So if you ever go diving in a lake,
Avoiding the hake (and make sure to bring cake),
Then you might just find a musical group
Banging with drumsticks tins of soup.

And all the fish in the lake
Wonder how long it will take
For Timothy's band to finally make
A song that doesn't make your ears ache.